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Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Giving it my best effort

I can't begin to express how much everyone's kind and encouraging words have been helping me through this. And to learn some of you have gone through the same type of loss has helped me feel not so alone. I honestly don't know what I would do if I didn't have the support of my blogger friends. People who aren't 'animal' people just don't understand how devastating it is to lose a fur kid.  Thank you my friends. Truly, thank you.

I have earnestly been trying to take everyone's advice to heart. So, as I type this Ms. Stella is in my lap snoring sound asleep. I welcome their love and know it's important to remember they loved Betty just as much as I did and they're hurting too.

I figured it's important to keep myself busy right now so I decided to repaint our bathroom. I went to Lowe's for the first time without Betty or any of the other dogs for that matter.
I'm confident I would come off as crazy if I told the average person that pushing the empty cart made me choked up the entire time I was walking through the store. I felt like one of those movie star types that had to keep her sun glasses on while inside. Most of the people that work at Lowe's knew Betty by name and I was so scared one of them was going to ask me where she was. I know I would have totally lost it. I feel really lucky no one did, or maybe it was the fact I was hiding behind my sunglasses they figured it was best to leave me alone.

I'm looking forward to the day when I can remember Betty and it will bring a smile to my face instead of tears...

Thank you again for everyone's love during this really hard time.

Shannon & the Smushies


pam said...

Everytime I try to comment I break down and can't continue. Please just know that you are loved and supported in this community.

And we all know that those that aren't dog lovers don't understand this grief. We Do... love

Brutus, Ellie, Pippa and Otto said...

Betty was family... As anytime a loss of a family member occurs, there will be a grieving process.

We are all here for you when you need us.

Pugs & Kisses,

Yoda & Brutus

Two French Bulldogs said...

We feel like we have known Betty forever. We get tears when we see her picture on our blog and visit you guys. Stella and Gunther are right there for you
Benny & Lily

Stubby said...

I'm remembering Betty every day and I still can't believe she's gone. I wish I could have spent more time with her and gotten to know her better but I know that she felt my love.

I will miss her always but I will heal just like you will. We all grieve together because that's what a family does. We move on but we don't forget those that have changed our lives.

Stella and Gunther need you now more than ever. They miss Betty terribly and see you crying so it makes them cry. Stay strong together and love each other. Days will get easier and the sun will shine again on the Smushie ranch.

Stubby xoxo

Frankie Furter and Ernie said...

The best thing about Blogville is that we are all in this together. We know that in many ways it is More difficult to deal with the loss of a beloved Furperson than a two legger.
We know that MANY two leggers can't understand our pain and and thus, help us to heal.
Blogvillians know only too well.
You can say ANYTHING to us and we will understand where you are coming from. Feel free to vent. We are here for you.

Anonymous said...

Oh, those first few days are especially hard, I know. It's so raw and new and the world seems like it's never going to be right again. Just remember - it's okay to feel that way. Don't rush it (as much as I know you want to). Allow yourself to grieve and then when you're ready, find a way to commemorate her and celebrate her life.

There's a quote that I love by Helen Keller: "What we have once enjoyed, we can never lose." Remember, you will never lose Betty. Not really.

With love,

Diane said...

Oh dear Shannon...that day will come when you will think of Betty & light up with a huge smile! We all loved Betty.
xoxo Diane
Kisses to Stella & Gunther too!

Tweedles -- that's me said...

Dear Shannon
Take our hands, and lets walk one step at a time.. together.
We are all crying with you.
All the sweet comments are so heart felt.
And Stubby was right when he said Gunther and Stella loved Betty as much as you,,, and they do not understand.
I know understand ,,, staying busy,, that was what I had to do when the swamps of sadness dragged me down too.... a very good idea...
but remember we are sitting shoulder to shoulder with you...
we will help you

Chicas Libelulas said...

Hello Shanon, Stella and Gunther,
Even though we have never met, we feel a part of your family, and feel free to vent to all us, because we all love our furry kids, and it is very hard for all you, but it goes one step at time, right now it is time to grieve, so you can go the next step of remembering bella Betty, and how she made all of you smile.
allot of hugs& bechos
Spongy, Licky & Marcella

Chicas Libelulas said...

I found this on my friends Facebook, and thought you would like it.
I feel Betty is with God, Happy and Pain free

" Meredith and Abbey

This is one of the kindest things you may ever see..

It is not known who replied, but there is a beautiful soul working in the dead letter office of the US postal service.
Our 14 year old dog, Abbey, died last month. The day after she died, my 4 year old daughter Meredith was crying and talking about how much she missed Abbey. She asked if we could write a letter to God so that when Abbey got to heaven, God would recognize her. I told her that I thought we could so she dictated these words:

"Dear God,
Will you please take care of my dog?
She died yesterday and is with you in heaven.
I miss her very much. I am happy that you let me have her as my dog even though she got sick.I hope you will play with her.
She likes to play with balls and to swim.
I am sending a picture of her so when you see her You will know that she is my dog.
I really miss her.

We put the letter in an envelope with a picture of Abbey and Meredith and addressed it to God/Heaven.. We put our return address on it. Then Meredith pasted several stamps on the front of the envelope because she said it would take lots of stamps to get the letter all the way to heaven. That afternoon she dropped it into the letter box at the post office. A few days later, she asked if God had gotten the letter yet. I told her that I thought He had.

Yesterday, there was a package wrapped in gold paper on our front porch addressed, 'To Meredith' in an unfamiliar hand. Meredith opened it. Inside was a book by Mr. Rogers called, 'When a Pet Dies..' Taped to the inside front cover was the letter we had written to God in its opened envelope. On the opposite page was the picture of Abbey & Meredith and this note:

"Dear Meredith,

Abbey arrived safely in heaven.
Having the picture was a big help.
I recognized Abbey right away.
Abbey isn't sick anymore.
Her spirit is here with me just like it stays in your heart.
Abbey loved being your dog.. Since we don't need our bodies in heaven,
I don't have any pockets to keep your picture in, so I am sending it back to you in this little book for you to keep and have something to remember Abbey by...

Thank you for the beautiful letter and thank your mother for helping you write it and sending it to me. What a wonderful mother you have.
I picked her especially for you.. I send my blessings every day and remember that I love you very much.

By the way, I'm easy to find, I am wherever there is love.

God"See More

Chicas Libelulas said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dana Orsborn said...

Losing a furry child is one of the
most devastating things some of us
go through. The first week or two is always the hardest.

Betty was so lucky
to have you. Without you, her
life would have never been the same.
You enabled her sexy to shine through.

-Dana & Daisy

~Kim at Golden Pines~ said...

I came to your blog via Tweedles and just wanted to leave a comment about how sorry I am about the loss of your precious girl Betty.
I know all too well how difficult it is to lose one of our four legged family members, and the sadness that is felt as life continues without them. I'm glad you're finding comfort with 'your crew' and also hope you find comfort in your wonderful memories of her that no one can take away. There will be a day when you can remember her and not cry, but even on those days there may still be a tear or two. Take care and know that you'll see her again, and what a day that will be!

Archie and Melissa said...

dear shannon
oh i am giving you such a huge hug. betty is always always with you, bruce, stella and gunther.
our babies never leave us and as we continue to feel better, we can see and hear them talking to us.
she loves you more than words can say and she feels so happy in every little bit of relief and in short time, joy you feel.
she is pure love and joy and shines brightly for all of us because of you and all of your love for her.

Minnie Moo said...

That day will come when you can smile about Betty again. I promise.


Minnie Moo

Kelly said...

Thinking of you today, Shannon.

One day at a time. One MOMENT at a time. You are surviving and you're making Betty proud. I promise.

Pugs in Space said...

I am deeply deeply sorry to hear of the loss of your beloved pet.

It is very good to give your remaining dogs lots of love and cuddling. A routine and keeping busy is good to a certain extent but be sure to in doing this that you do not not suppress, avoid or hide your grief.

Sit with your pain and allow yourself to cry. It will let the remaining dogs know that you do care about the passing of their beloved doggy family member.

I know this is hard to do and to work through because my 10 year old Pug passed away unexpectedly last June.

I made sure to cuddle a lot with my remaining Pug and worked through my grief by embracing it and not stuffing away my pain.

I would just sit with Ruby and cry and talk to her about what happened. I explained to her that Charlie's body was not working anymore and that he was suffering so we had to take him to the vet so the vet could help him out of his body so he could go onto the next part of his journey.

I told her how much I missed Charlie and what a wonderful dog he was and that I was so very grateful and happy that she was still with me and I appreciated all of her love and support.

It is a process for all of you to go through together without shutting out feelings or stuffing emotions away to be brave. Take it easy on yourself and mourn deeply.

May peace be with you during this very rough time.

Kelley Carey MacDonald said...

Honey, I am sure Betty knew just how much you loved her. You probably gave her the best time of her life! She was a doll, and I'm so sorry for what you have to go through. (((hugs))))

Ms. ~K said...

The pain will ease, the love and memories will be there forever!

Priscilla said...

What a shock to hear of Betty's passing. I never met her but she was dear to me and I still have her photos in my office and on my fridge.

I recently took the Frankinator to the groomers, they knew Maya B and that she was sick but it was the first time I was there since her passing. I knew I'd be in for it but I know how much they loved her and it was good to talk to them about her passing. I don't know if it ever really gets easier but this much I know, Betty knows how much you love her. She loved her forever family deeply. And she would want you to have peace that she is in a happy place. (devouring all the flowers lol!)

Continue your good work with rescues. Because we love much we hurt much. It's what we do. Give yourself time to mourn and heal but don't let it keep you from your work.

**hugs dear friend**

Vito and Gina said...

We just found out the news about Betty and wanted to send our condolences and thoughts to you and the pugs. We're so so so sorry. Hang in there and cry when you feel like crying. Don't hold it in. Rest peacefully sweet Betty.

Vito (and Gina too)

GAIL said...

Perhaps one of these places can help you. Hang in there.
Pet Loss Support Hotline
College of Veterinary Medicine
Cornell University
(607) 253-3932
Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday
6-9pm EST

The Iams Company maintains a special toll-free number for grieving pet owners.
The Iams Pet Loss Support Center & Hotline can be reached at:
1-888-332-7738 Monday through Friday, 8 am to 5

GAIL said...


Another resource for you.

Dexter said...

Keeping busy is good. Make something beautiful. Paint the bathroom and every time you look at it you will remember Betty and soon it will go from sad to happy sad which is the most we can hope for.

Mango Momma